i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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