I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
