We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Randomize