better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
Randomize
