Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
