nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize
