I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Randomize
