mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
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