bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
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