Kiss
Puke
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
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