So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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