.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
