Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Randomize
