I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Randomize
