I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize