Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
I still have a little drunk in my system
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
Randomize
