i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Randomize
