What tipped you off? The sombrero?
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
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