Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Randomize