found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Randomize
