If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
