would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
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