I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
