love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize
