Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
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