Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
Randomize
