i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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