hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
Randomize
