I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
