its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
The adults are the big ones right?
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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