she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
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