There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
