oh god the rape fog is back!
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Randomize
