So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
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