Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
Randomize
