please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Randomize
