i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
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