ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
Randomize