Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
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