Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
