We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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