Moan for me like Helen Keller
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
