Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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