So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Randomize
