I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Randomize
