what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
Randomize
