For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
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