you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
Randomize
