idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
