She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
