We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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